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chichi556
New_user chichi556 is new to Chictopia!

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chichi556
posts: 6

Disclaimer: I’m sorry this is such a long post, but i really need someone to here me out and give some thoughtful advice. TY :)!

Here’s a little info about my relationships: I have never been in one. Yep… I have been single since the time I was born lol and I’m 17. But i guess i have learned to deal with it. Anyways, there have been some major changes this past school year (i was a junior). for the first time a guy that i liked actually liked me back (and the first time i had guys like me all together lol), but i guess i was sending the wrong signals, so we just stayed friends. instead, he went out with a close friend of mine, which i had no problems with. And during that time period, this boy and i would text eachother, laugh in class together and just have fun like any normal friends would. I actually thought that i found a true guy best friend, but i guess not. Everything was cool until soccer season (which starts in Jan.) when he admitted that he still had feelings for me and that he liked me still and thought i was beautiful. Now, I’m not gonna lie, I did think it was flattering and i kind of liked him back. but deep down inside i knew that the situation was wrong so i never acted upon it (You can’t love a GF and like another girl at the same time, you know? especially, if that girl’s your GF’s friend). ok to make long story short, this situation kind of got Dramatic (w/ a capital D), per se. i told my friend (the girlfriend), she got mad at him, but took him back the next day (yeah, idk what he told her, but i think its a lie). this boy and i eventually agreed to be nothing more than friends but up until now, i hav not said a single word to him since school ended (partly because i was sick…) i feel like he lied to not only my friend but to me in a way. he created all this unnecassey drama and excused it as being an “emotional person” (basically,he couldn’t decide if he liked me or if he loved her __). what’s worse was the fact that my friend actually took him back. i know ppl have different ways of dealing with situations but… come on, really? Because of him, I’m just done with boys and their idiotic ways. i know not all boys are like this but, i think it would be best if i let God give me someone instead of searching for them( sorry to throw religion in here). But was i wrong to give distance and to cut him off like that? I really do need advice… thnx for reading!

P.S. i don’t normally go around asking ppl for advice but i figured this would be the best place :)

posted over 2 years ago
BeckyBedbug
Style_council
BeckyBedbug
posts: 391

Oh, sweetie, you’re only 17!

I didn’t have a boyfriend until I was 17 and then I was engaged at 20! There’s plenty of time yet. I never thought I’d marry young when I was the only girl in school who had never had a boyfriend!

From my experience, guys who mess you, or others, around are not worth it. You were definitely right to cut him off. He’s not worth your time. I met my fiancé when I decided to stop looking. I wasn’t expecting anything so I think I was less nervous about making a good impression at all times.

You have your faith which is fantastic. Just trust that and enjoy yourself! You might not believe it now but there will come a time when you would do anything to be 17 and single again haha! Do what you want to do, enjoy the freedom that comes with youth and eventually, when you least expect it, someone will come along.

posted over 2 years ago
 
chichi556
New_user chichi556 is new to Chictopia!

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chichi556
posts: 6

thnks for the advice beckybedbug!

posted over 2 years ago
 
j_fo
Style_council
j_fo
posts: 60

Its funny cause when I read this I instantly thought of myself. First off I just want to say before replying I checked your profile and I thought its cool because we have many things in common. One I am 17 and never been in an official relationship. 2 I am African American of African desent . And 3 I have strong enough faith that when my friends ask me why I’m still single I say I put my trust in God. I know he will bring the special guy to me and I’m not in a rush because I have my future to worry about. Were upcoming seniors and have so much on our plate that boyfriend os the last thing to worry about

posted over 2 years ago
 
j_fo
Style_council
j_fo
posts: 60

Plus you are very pretty and I’m sure when you head off to college you will find someone worth being with. The thing about relationships in high school is that its treated as an accessories, something to be shown off because it seems like everybody is in a relationship. But I’m big on if you can live without it, then you don’t meed it. There’s a lot pf baggage that comes with being in Aa relationship at this age… so much peer pressure and neediness and I believe this is what causes girls to end up being dependent on their boyfriends. Whereas if you are single now you have more time to achieve your goals in life and learn to be independent and I guarantee some boy will come along and appreciate that about you

posted over 2 years ago
 
j_fo
Style_council
j_fo
posts: 60

Anyways back to your story lil you are completely right for not talking to that boy. The fact that he was trying to talk to you while dating your friend shows hes nothing but trouble but your biggest mistake I believe was to not tell your friend how you felt about him from the gecko b/c now shes oblivious to the fact that you like him and the fact that she took him back shows that she must rlly like him. But I can almost gaurrantee you that they will breakup b/c relationships like that don’t last. Anyways sorry for the unnecessary long answer. HOPE THIS HELPS!

posted over 2 years ago
 
chichi556
New_user chichi556 is new to Chictopia!

Make Her Feel Welcome with Chic Points
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When chichi556 reaches 200 Chic Points, she will be in the Style Council!
chichi556
posts: 6

omg j_fo! we do have so much in common! anywho…thanks for the advice. it was appreciated and i didn’t mind if it was long lol. and yes, from now on i will put my trust in God to find someone for me. :)

posted over 2 years ago
 
BowsandGlitterxo
Style_council
BowsandGlitt...
posts: 466

First off you are only 17 don’t stress about finding a guy …some people find their soul mates young and some don’t. As for this guy.. it seems he wants to sample what’s out there while hes already committed I think it is better off you distance yourself …he hurt you aAND your friend. He doesn’t seem truthful enough to even be a friend. As for your friend its sad that d she didn’t believe you don’t take it personal I think at this age everyone is just happy to be ina a relationship. Friends come and go…I think she will realize unfortunately the hard way that you were right. You can still be friendly with her. All in all my advice to you is ….you don’t know what the future will hold ….friends and boys come and go…do what makes YOUhappy and you will find friends and a boy that fits into your life

posted over 2 years ago
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